Ode to the Nice Guys Posted bypaulschreiber April 1, 2005 1 Comment on Ode to the Nice Guys This rant was written for the Wharton Undergraduate Journal.
Ah yes, here it is again, a tribute to all the nice girls out there. You know the kind of girl I mean, the kind of girl you can bring home to mom and put your arm around in a â€œbrotherly sort of wayâ€ while claiming the whole time that the two of you are â€œjust friendsâ€ (yes kids, it can go both ways). The girls that donâ€™t obsess in front of the mirror for hours upon hours because unlike the girls that the boys choose to date instead, she realizes that thereâ€™s more to people than the make-up they plaster on their face or the clothes that more or less cover their bodies. The girls that can listen to rock music without wishing for a boy band and the girls that can play xbox and drink beer instead of getting a manicure while sipping a martini.
This is a tribute to the girls who are â€œone of the guysâ€ and are never noticed as â€œone of the girlsâ€ and are often claimed to be â€œlike a little sisterâ€. The friend a guy can take as a back-up date in case the blond haired bimbo he had originally asked to go fell through. The one who you made the promise to that if neither of you are married by the time youâ€™re 40 then you two will get married. The girl that you ask to help you pick out the best outfit and the best cologne for your first date with some random chick you asked out at a bar.
This is to honor the girl who patiently gives their guy friends â€œgirl adviceâ€ while watching their friendâ€™s girlfriend manipulate and twist his heart around until finally sheâ€™s had enough and is bored enough to cheat on him and dump him. Then in a blatant rebound he comes to her and makes a move on her because his bed feels empty that night. This is to the girl that all the guys flirt with but never ask out because sheâ€™s only loved in a â€œbrotherlyâ€ way.
The girl that is sweet, smart, and honest but not hot enough in that supermodel sort of way to get noticed. The one that is beautiful in her own natural way but is overlooked because of all the made up, faked up girls out there who share the IQ of a blender. The girl who studied in school instead of sleeping around and who went to prom in a group of friends rather than go with a guy who just expected her to put out. This is to the girls that donâ€™t feel the need to wear push-up bras and skimpy clothes to attract a guys attention because they know that they wonâ€™t attract the kind of guy that will respect her even though they know that any guy that will respect her will be ogling after the girls who are wearing push-up bras and skimpy clothes wishing they had the courage to ask them out.
This is dedicated to the girls that the guys call late at night and have secret friendships with. When late at night they get called up by their nocturnal friends and talk and laugh into the wee hours of the morning but the next day he passes without so much as a glance. This is for the girls that donâ€™t gossip and complain and for the girls who will cook breakfast for their guy friends when they have a hangover and the girl they had spent the night with had disappeared with the moon. For the girls who donâ€™t kiss and tell and who, well letâ€™s face it, pretty much donâ€™t kiss at all because their too busy saving their guy friendâ€™s butts when an ex girlfriend comes along with her new boyfriend and her guy friend is so crushed because he hadnâ€™t moved on yet so she pretends to be his girlfriend so he can save face while on the inside she wishes that one day they wonâ€™t have to pretend even though she knows that he â€œloves herâ€¦ but platonically.â€
So while I also raise my glass to the nice guys who are claimed to finish last, I again raise my glass to the nice girls, who are always â€œloved like a little sisterâ€ and who are overlooked when their guy friends have on their â€œhot girl radarâ€. I trust that maybe these nice guys that are claimed to be out there will one day find this nice girl and help her believe that she isnâ€™t just â€œone of the guysâ€ but in fact a beautiful woman that makes all the difference in the world to someone.
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