yay church:

The last half century or so of human progress must have been extremely hard on the Roman Catholic bishop of Calgary.

Things were so much simpler and easier when women were safely in their place, gays were safely in the closet, priests were safely in charge, and coercion and intimidation were the natural order of things.

Shipping Via Snail:

Apparently I need to order more of my stuff directly from warehouses in Shanghai, where they don’t ship things by strapping them to a narcoleptic snail with no sense of direction.

What you’ll wish you’d known:

I’m not saying you shouldn’t hang out with your friends– that you should all become humorless little robots who do nothing but work. Hanging out with friends is like chocolate cake. You enjoy it more if you eat it occasionally than if you eat nothing but chocolate cake for every meal. No matter how much you like chocolate cake, you’ll be pretty queasy after the third meal of it. And that’s what the malaise one feels in high school is: mental queasiness.

The Annmarie Montade Five (which is really just Saucy minus Cynthia and plus Naimee and is four people).

dumb criminal n+1:

A crack cocaine dealer who forgot a backpack containing C$91,000 ($74,000) in a Winnipeg mall was arrested after he tried to reclaim the bag at the mall’s lost-and-found desk.

Sign the petition to stop ashlee simpson.

HP printers jump the shark:

H-P has quietly begun implementing “region coding” for its highly lucrative print cartridges for some of its newest printers sold in Europe. Try putting a printer cartridge bought in the U.S. into a new H-P printer configured to use cartridges purchased in Europe and it won’t work. Software in the printer determines the origin of the ink cartridge and whether it will accept it.

The company introduced region-coding on several printers in the summer so it won’t have to keep altering prices to keep pace with currency movements, says Kim Holm, vice president for H-P’s supplies business in Europe, the Middle East and Africa. H-P eventually plans to introduce the concept across its entire line of inkjet printers, he adds.

Oakland’s recycling program kicks Sunnyvale’s recycling program’s ass.

I have this recurring nightmare:

I can’t believe anyone would be awarded with anything in the name of Diane Warren. It would be like awarding someone the Timothy McVeigh Award for an accomplishment in architecture.

A very Saucy Monky house concert.
RSVP. Suggested donation: $10
Saturday, January 15, 2004. 8 p.m. Sharp.
Sunnyvale, California 94085

What’s going on

Since two was so much fun, I’m doing it again. My first house concert of 2005 will feature the acoustic half of Saucy Monky. Annmarie Cullen and Cynthia Catania will start the new year off right.

Your New Year’s resolution? Support great music. Start here.

About Saucy Monky

Saucy Monky’s debut EP Celebrity Trash got noticed with its infectiously catchy “Flicker” and “Don’t Wanna Know Your Name.”

They’ve followed that up with Turbulence, which features more of Annemarie and Cynthia’s fab voices and sticks-to-you-like-candy-apples pop. And one crazy cover of … yes … “I Touch Myself.”

While Annmarie (of Dublin, Ireland) and Cynthia (somewhere in New Jersey) found each other by accident, where you will be a few Saturdays from now is completely under your control.

FAQ

Q: So what is a house concert, anyway?
A: It’s a wonderful way to experience music. Acoustic sound, intimate
setting. No smoke, no drunks, no obnoxious suits.

Q: Where is the concert?
A: In my living room. Really. You’ll get directions to the house when
you RSVP. (hint, hint!)

Q: When should I arrive?
A: Between 7:30 and 7:59 is good. If you’re late, enter via the back
door.

Q: What about transportation?
A: There’s plenty of street parking, I live within walking distance of
the Caltrain station, and the VTA buses drop you off two blocks away.

Q: Can I blog about this concert?
A: Sure. Please direct people to RSVP to [email protected].
Don’t post my other email address on the web for spambots.

Q: Who gets the money?
A: Annmarie and Cynthia. Every cent.

Q: Will they have CDs and merch for sale?
A: Indeedy.

Q: Who should I bring?
A: Bring a friend! Bring a date! Bring your Mom! Bring all three!

Q: What should I bring?
A: Drinks and snacks will be provided, but if you’d like to bring
something to share, I’d be really grateful. If you have folding chairs,
let me know.