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Monday, December 21st v32.8
Holy well water, Batman!
The Maine Press Herald
is reporting that an outbreak of contaminated water is
forcing residents to filter their water to remove
highly corrosive chemicals. Unfortunately, this news didn't
reach the Meader household on time, and poor Ryan is sick
in bed with a bad stomach flu. He's being treated with
large quantities of
Tylenol Flu
and orange juice.
Ryan's physician, in a clear breach of doctor-patient
confidentiality, sent us this note:
Ryan is such a hypochondriac. He's faking it, I swear!
We wish Ryan a speedy recovery. Get well quick and post the damn update!
Quark to launch L3
Word out of Denver, Colorado
is that Quark is readying a K2-killer. Not content to rest on
its record of frequent updates, excellent customer service
and low pricing, Quark is about to launch a new product
called "L3." A source on the nearby
Aspen ski slopes filled
us in:
I was chatting with some hottie on the triple black diamond
run. Turns out he works for some company Quark, and he's
a software developer (pretty damn good skier for a geek,
actually). After a few drinks, he couldn't stop blabbering
about el-three, or something like that. Told me it would
cost $43.17, take up 516 kays of disk space, two em-bees
of RAM and had twice as many features of page-maker,
photoshoppe and illustator combined.
Well, there's nothing like a little alcohol to loosen the
lips -- actually, that's not all she was probably loosening --
but this rumour looks interesting. What's even more interesting is
the ship date -- January 17th, 1999.
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Yesterday's News |
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Gil Amelio flipping burgers at McDonald's
Intel introduces carrotique processor
Read Friday's news.
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